Stories

I am writing my story with the wish that it may give others HOPE, something I wasn't given.

I am a nurse who retired early and became a full time gardener. My husband, a cardiologist, and I have four acres and live on a beautiful lake that we irrigate from. We have over three hundred rose bushes, hundreds of azaleas, camellias, Japanese maples, and thousands of different kinds of flowers. Gardening is our passion besides sailing and enjoying wine.

It all started eighteen months before the diagnosis with bowel changes which I attributed to my coffee. Then I started to experience a pain in my left mid abdomen. I attributed this pain to all the hard work I was doing in the yard. I turned fifty during this time and had a colonoscopy which was normal. So as the pain continued I thought nothing of it. In the spring of 2004, I noticed I was getting tired sooner in the day and was losing weight. On June 9, 2004 I couldn't stand the pain any longer. My husband ordered an ultrasound and CT of my abdomen. BAM! There it was, a 3.5x3.5 cm tumor in the body and tail of my pancreas that was attached to back wall of stomach. I was referred to a surgeon and I saw him the very next week. After several more CT scans he said "No surgery, inoperable". His advice was radiation to control my pain.

The surgeon told me to go online and check out the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network but not to read other websites. He put me in a study of Xeloda and radiation which I started in July. The CT scan four weeks later showed no shrinkage. Then, I did 9 weeks of Xeloda only. November's CT scan showed some shrinkage. At this point, he decided to give me aggressive drugs. He started me on Gemzar and oxaliplatin. March's CT/PET scan showed dramatic shrinkage. This CT scan gave me, my husband, and my surgeon hope. Then I took Gemzar and Taxotere followed by Tarceva.

July's CT and PET scans showed no cancer! I was scheduled for surgery!!!

On August 11, 2005 I had a distal pancreatectomy and splenectomy. I had clean margins & lymph nodes and was declared free of cancer.

Three years after my surgery, my cancer has returned and I am taking part in a clinical trial.

The best part about having this cancer --- it has shown me that there is always HOPE even when the doctors tell you to go home and make your final plans.

This journey has been a unique one. It has shown me how many friends that I have and how wonderful they are. Someone drove me to all my radiation treatments, to all my doctors appointments, and all my IV chemo treatments. I never had to go alone. I have come to appreciate the courage required to never give up. Today's modern medicine is constantly working for a cure. I am one of the lucky ones. I am blessed.